Controlling the conversation …

You remember that conversation.

You know, the one you didn’t want to have.

You were sitting with a friend who brought up something you didn’t want to talk about. It wasn’t a bad something. It might have been it simply bored you and that’s why you didn’t want to talk about it.

But your friend wanted to talk about it, so you did. You found yourself sitting there listening “on purpose” because it was a friend and they wanted to converse.

If only you could control the situation, you wouldn’t be having this conversation!

Well, thanks to technology, more people are controlling conversations, tuning out what they don’t want to talk about, and broadcasting only what they want others to know.

With the popularity of texting, blogs, email, Twitter, Facebook, and other social media we’re interacting less in person and more via technology.

On the one hand, we’re expanding our contacts to include people around the globe, persons we would likely never interact with if it were not for technology. Businesses are growing, friendships are forming, and even the Gospel is being proclaimed by the use of technology in human communication.

On the other hand, the increased use of such outlets may be contributing to making us a little more shallow.

You see, when you are sitting with a friend, the time together isn’t “all about you.” To really be a friend when with a friend, you have to exercise a level of mutual submission. Maybe I really would prefer not to sit through the story you want to tell me, but if it’s important to you, then it’s important to me because you are my friend. So I sit and listen as attentively as I can.

However, when I’m not sitting with you, but instead I’m “conversing” with you via text messages or perhaps on Twitter, then I will communicate to you what I want and I don’t have to read what I don’t want … or I’ll get to it when I want. When I’m not with you, the level of mutual submission needed for interaction is reduced, so I’ll likely focus on what interests me and not you. I’ll tweet, post, blog, and email what I want you to hear, and comments received are secondary. The focus becomes putting out the message I want others to have.

Technology can be a great tool, but it has its limits. It cannot replace all the subtleties of sitting across, face-to-face with another person and having to be an authentic, in-the-flesh friend. And nothing can replace the caring touch of another human being.

Personally, I’m a proponent of technology for all the positive things we can accomplish with it. Just be careful that one of the results of its use isn’t making you a little more shallow.

Scotty