What do you do when you get the “no”?

“No.”

I heard that word a lot when I provided Personal Training services in a gym.

I worked with numerous people who were joining a gym either for the first time, or the first time in a long time. I always took plenty of time to listen to why they were there, and what they not only really wanted to accomplish, but what they needed to accomplish. Most simply wanted to lose weight. Many needed to lose weight and change their diets for serious health needs. Others wanted muscles they had never developed.

After our time together, I presented them with a plan tailored specifically to help them accomplish their needs and wants.

Did most of them jump at it?

No.

Most said “no.”

They knew what they needed, and they knew what they wanted. But deep down, they also knew they were not willing to pay the price for either. Many chose to do nothing to improve their diabetes, poor cardiac health, obesity, fatigue, or the other health and fitness issues that plagued their lives.

The “no’s” came a little more reluctantly with many of the people I have worked with as a clinical counselor. We would spend time understanding precisely what their issues were, and what the answers were to their issues. It was harder for those people to actually say “no” because it would be obvious they were rejecting the very answers they needed to their problems in life.

But the “no’s” came anyway. Not that they didn’t want the results applying the answers could bring. They simply didn’t want to do the work necessary to get the results. Some were willing to let marriages fail, family relationships fail, friendships fail, businesses fail, projects fail, ministries fail, and experience other failures because they were not willing to pay the price for the desired (or needed) results.

And after more than 35 years of serving as a minister, I’ve seen the same thing when it comes to people and their souls. Many say “no” to Jesus.

What do you do when someone says no?

That is a difficult moment for a sincere servant of Jesus Christ. What do you do when you get the “no”?

One of my favorite Bible stories is the one about the rich young ruler (Luke 18:18-22) because it answers this question. Jesus was asked what this young man needed to do to inherit eternal life. Jesus answered the man. Who then walked away sad.

Get this: this guy has the Creator of all things tell him directly what he needs to do to live forever. What a find! What an answer! Who would not jump at that?!

This guy wouldn’t. And didn’t.

And get this: Jesus let him go.

There’s nothing recorded here about Jesus chasing the guy. There’s nothing recorded about Jesus saying something like, “Hang on a minute, let’s talk about this. We can work something out …”

There are answers to the issues in our lives. Sometimes people don’t like the answers. And as much as you may want to see someone make the right choice, you cannot coerce a “yes” heart. You cannot force a commitment. You cannot turn someone else’s “no” into a sincere “yes.”

At those times, you can only do what Jesus Himself did: let them go.

Wow! That can be hard, and if you really care about them, it should be hard to see people choose to fail or to fall. But it happens every day.

How about you? Are you wrestling with some “no’s” in your own life? Do you wish for better fitness and health, but not really willing to do the work to attain it? Would you like richer, deeper relationships? Does Christ need to be Lord instead of just another influence?

There are answers for you to achieve these things in your life. But you will never do so until you are willing to stop saying “no” to the cost of achieving what you need, or even what you want.

So … what’s your answer?

Scotty