SUICIDE PREVENTION – Know the warning signs …

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Those of us who work in counseling are told it’s not a matter of if, but when we will lose a client to suicide.

I’m happy to say in more than three decades of Christian counseling, I haven’t lost a client to suicide yet. But I’ve worked with many people who were experiencing suicidal ideation, and many who know the agonizing pain of having lost a loved one to suicide. For those struggling with such darkness piercing their minds and emotions, they strongly identify with the warped sentiment of Friedrich Nietzsche who quipped, “It is always consoling to think of suicide: in that way one gets through many a bad night.”

Those who contemplate taking their own lives have, in some way, navigated their thinking that life’s circumstances and experiences have failed to such a degree that ceasing to live seems the only practical answer for them. Life has not turned out as they hoped, but when that happens — as it does for MOST of us! — despair is not the answer. Jonathan Alexander illustrates in the following clip how life not being what WE hoped for can sometimes be a great blessing:

    • One of my favorite books is Cormac McCarthy’s,

The Sunset Limited.

    • It’s a novel written in dramatic form (feels like a screen play). It captures the conversation of two characters: Black and White. Black is a recovered addict and former inmate who found Jesus, and White is an atheist professor who tries to kill himself.

The whole book is a conversation in Black’s kitchen after he’s rescued White from a failed suicide attempt. The conversation ultimately is a theological one that centers on the hope or hopelessness with or without God in the equation of life. And it’s written in McCarthy’s terse, sparse language that gets straight to the heart.

Here’s one of my favorite points of dialogue:

Black: If this ain’t the life you had in mind, what was?

White: I don’t know. Not this. Is your life the one you’d planned?

Black: No, it ain’t. I got what I needed instead of what I wanted and that’s just about the best kind of luck you can have.

The “best luck” a person can have is discovering the life-transforming hope found in Jesus Christ alone. It is not a man-made hope that fails us; it is a supernatural hope that transforms and empowers us to not just survive, but to thrive through any trial or circumstance, to find meaning in life and purpose for living regardless of what befalls us.

Many don’t know that hope.

Let’s take a moment to explore just how serious an issue suicide is in America by looking at some statistics about suicide provided by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and Mental Health America:

    • Suicide is the 11th leading cause of death in the U.S.
    • In 2021, 48,183 Americans died by suicide.
    • In 2021, there were an estimated 1.70 million suicide attempts.
    • The age-adjusted suicide rate in 2021 was 14.04 per 100,000 individuals.
    • The rate of suicide is highest in middle-aged white men.
    • In 2021, men died by suicide 3.90 times more than women.
    • On average, there are 132 suicides per day.

PREVENTING SUICIDE
A suicide attempt is a clear indication that something is gravely wrong in a person’s life. No matter the race or age of the person; how rich or poor they are, it is true that most people who die by suicide have a mental or emotional disorder. The most common underlying disorder is depression – 30 percent to 70 percent of suicide victims suffer from major depression or bipolar (manic-depressive) disorder.

Although they may not call prevention centers, people considering suicide usually do seek help; for example, 64 percent of people who attempt suicide visit a doctor in the month before their attempt, and 38 percent in the week before.

It is common that persons contemplating suicide become withdrawn or have demonstrated behavioral changes. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline provides the following statement, along with warning signs all of us should learn:

“The following signs may mean someone is at risk for suicide. The risk of suicide is greater if a behavior is new or has increased and if it seems related to a painful event, loss, or change. If you or someone you know exhibits any of these signs, seek help as soon as possible by calling the Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255):”

    • Talking about wanting to die or to kill themselves.
    • Looking for a way to kill themselves, such as searching online or buying a gun.
    • Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live.
    • Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain.
    • Talking about being a burden to others.
    • Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs.
    • Acting anxious or agitated; behaving recklessly.
    • Sleeping too little or too much.
    • Withdrawing or isolating themselves.
    • Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge.
    • Displaying extreme mood swings.
    • Giving away prized possessions.
    • Lack of interest in future plans.

Remember: Eight out of ten people considering suicide give some sign of their intentions. People who talk about suicide, threaten suicide, or call suicide crisis centers are 30 times more likely than average to kill themselves.

If you think someone is considering suicide:

    • Trust your instincts that the person may be in trouble.
    • Talk with the person about your concerns. Communication needs to include LISTENING.
    • Ask direct questions without being judgmental. Determine if the person has a specific plan to carry out the suicide. The more detailed the plan, the greater the risk.
    • Get professional help, even if the person resists.
    • Do not leave the person alone.
    • Do not swear to secrecy.
    • Do not act shocked or judgmental.
    • Do not counsel the person yourself.

Resources in your community:

    • Telephone hotlines (Can be obtained from the telephone book, local Mental Health Associations, community centers, or United Way chapters). If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, call 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) or 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
    • Clergy.
    • Medical and mental health professionals.
    • Law-enforcement agencies.

Scotty