Every puppy becomes a dog: How we’re insincere about love …

From the selfishness that we often hide as the core of who we are, we are wildly insincere when it comes to loving others unconditionally.

Anyone.

Shona Sibary illustrates this insincerity about love in a story she wrote for the Daily Mail, admitting, “I get rid of dogs as soon as they stop being cute puppies.” Indeed, she has given away four dogs in four years. Here’s her story …

I’m a serial dogamist. In the early stages of the relationship I’m head over heels. I attend all the puppy classes. I don’t even begrudge picking up dog poo.

There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for my new canine companion. But the moment things get complicated and they develop a problem, I don’t covet a dog-free existence like any other sane person might. Instead, I start wondering if there is another, more suitable dog out there.

Maybe one that is less bouncy, less barky, less inclined to moult everywhere. And so the new search begins and I cannot rest until I have found a replacement puppy to lie adoringly at my feet.

Sibary concluded her dog-ditching story with some insights about love:

Isn’t every commitment like a puppy waiting to turn into a real dog? We begin our commitments with enthusiasm and anticipation, until responsibility kicks in. Everybody loves the puppy stage, but every puppy eventually becomes a real dog.

The French proverb, “You need to not only want what you want, you need to want what your want leads to,” finds perfect application here. Real love, committed love, not only wants what it wants, it wants what that want leads to.

Love that fades with effort is puppy love. Love that fulfills its obligations is real love.

Don’t discard your relationships when someone starts molting!

To enjoy long-term committed relationships we must accept the long-term responsibilities that come with them.

Bottom line: A mature relationship involves a real dog.

We can be just as insincere about loving others as Sibary is about committing to an adorable puppy that will only become a real dog. The apostle Paul points to such insincerity and says …

“Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves,” Romans 12:9-10 (NIV). The New American Standard Bible states verse 9 like this, “Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil; cling to what is good,” and the New Living Translation words it like this, “Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.”

It’s easy to love a puppy, they’re so adorable it’s hard not to! But what about when they become a dog?

It’s easy to love a person when they’re burden-free, care-free, and wholly beneficial — a “puppy.” It’s different when they have needs, and problems, and sufferings, and sin … when they’ve gone from “puppy” to “real dog.” We human beings went to the “real dog” stage with God very quickly, yet His example for us is a perfect, unfailing, sincere love which we are to use as our model for loving others …

“God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love — not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins. Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other,” 1 John 4:9-11.

When it comes to sincerely loving others, are you a serial dogamist, or are you allowing the Holy Spirit to transform you into be a real dog lover?

Scotty