What does a “Christian family” look like?

Have you heard the story about little Johnny who, after the dedication of his baby brother in church, sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car? His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally the boy replied, “That pastor said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, but I want to stay with you guys!”

Would your children laugh at a claim by you that you have a “Christian household?”

If your children can’t believe it, just how realistic are those claims?!

So what does a “Christian family” really look like? Without creating an exhaustive list, let me share with you just a half dozens keys to being a Christian family:

A Christian family is a place where Christ is pre-eminent. I list this first because it’s usually the hardest for some people to accept. It’s not uncommon in households that profess to be Christian where a parent or parents actually love their children more than God, or cherish a spouse above Jesus Christ, or children love their parents more than the Lord. Key to becoming a follower of Christ is that He becomes pre-eminent over all persons and things. That’s how it’s supposed to be!

“For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities — all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. He is also head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything,” Colossians 1:13-18 (NASB).

Jesus would reference His pre-eminent position with a family like this: “If you love your father or mother more than you love me, you are not worthy of being mine; or if you love your son or daughter more than me, you are not worthy of being mine,” Matthew 10:37. Blunt words, but they erase any doubt that, even within our families, Jesus Christ must be pre-eminent.

A Christian family is a place where godly parents live as ambassadors for Christ, first to their children. Every person reconciled to God and adopted into His family also receive an appointment by Him to be ambassadors for Christ to this sin-laden world (the Apostle Paul explains this in 2 Cor. 5:18-20). That work begins by godly parents making disciples of Jesus of their own children, and then leading their discipleship toward spiritual maturity. The first and greatest mission assignment to parents is to make disciples of their own children!

A Christian family is a place where growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ is a shared experience. As each member of the family enter into their own covenant relationship with Jesus, living out their faith, and becoming more and more like Jesus is something that is shared, supported, and encouraged as a family. This doesn’t mean a Christian family is a place where siblings never quarrel and husbands and wives never have their spats — there are no perfect families, Christian or not! But in a Christian household, family members are focusing day after day at growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord.

A Christian family is a place where loving and serving one another is practiced every day. There’s no greater laboratory for our faith than learning to live it out with and among the people we live with, our family. Again, there are no perfect families, and there are failures along the way in our efforts to love and serve each other, but we keep trying by the help of the Holy Spirit to learn how to love others like Jesus loves, and serve others like Jesus served so selflessly.

A Christian family is a place where the household resources are used to love and serve others beyond the family. Too many who profess to have a Christian family are content to limit their interest and interactions to only “family life.” But God calls us as ambassadors to those beyond our families, and to care for and minister to the needs of others outside our own household.

A Christian family is committed to being fully engaged as members of the greater family of God. Christian families understand “family” aren’t just the people living under the same roof, but that we are children of God and adopted into His family where we are to have fellowship and serve.

You’ve probably thought of things you might add to this list; these are just some of the distinctives to being a family that truly is devoted to following and serving the Lord.

Is yours a Christian family? Does Christ reign as pre-eminent in your household? Are you supporting one another to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ? Or do you need to examine some things that may need to change so that your family can, together, be obedient followers of Jesus?

Scotty