Do you welcome people into your presence or your life?

Could it be one of the key reasons why the church is so ineffective with people is because we practice a faux compassion that really is not the expression of Christlike love?

Let me give a real life example of what I mean.

A few days ago I drove to a nearby park for some fresh air and exercise. As I parked, I spotted some people coming my way on the sidewalk in front of me. It was three women, and with them was an adult male in a wheelchair. From observation and listening, it appeared the fellow suffered from both physical disability and mild cognitive impairment. I spent some time observing this quartet and what I noticed was although the women allowed the man to be “included” in their friendly fellowship, they actually didn’t include him.

The women never made eye contact with the man, even though he was focused on their expressions as they chatted together. He would laugh when they laughed, but he wasn’t acknowleged.

He was never drawn into their conversation, the women only spoke among themselves.

Even though this fellow was included in the presence of these friends, by all appearances he wasn’t welcomed into their lives.

I was fascinated as I observed these friends strolling leisurely around the park. They captivated my observation because it made me wonder if this isn’t what we so often do in the church — we may welcome people into our presence, but not into our lives.

This is an old problem in the church. I think it was something similar that stirred John to call out our penchant for pretense:

“We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion — how can God’s love be in that person? Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions,” I John 3:16-18.

We cannot love others with the love of Christ by holding them at arms length and only allowing them into our presence, we must extend an invitation into our lives to love the way Jesus loves us. This doesn’t mean we have to make everyone a “best friend,” but it does mean we must remove any barriers that inhibit us from loving others the way Jesus loves us.

What is your practice – the pretense of only allowing people into your presence, or allowing people into your life enough that you can genuinely love them?

Scotty