On becoming a resilient person …

The late minister, Robert Schuller, was famous for saying, “Tough times never last, but tough people do.”

I know several people, including myself, who have had “tough times” last so long I seriously questioned Schuller’s quote — at least the “tough times never last part”!

And it isn’t so much that it’s “tough people” who make it through tough times, rather it’s resilient people are able to “bounce back” even when times turn tough.

Resiliency is a vital skill that can and should be developed so that you’re prepared to endure life’s tough times (which is why I’ve previously written on this topic here, here, and here). And you can be sure, as Jesus warned us, in this world we will have troubles that challenge us:

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows …” John 16:33a (that’s not the complete verse, but we’ll tie in the rest of it shortly).

With such an emphatic statement from Jesus, and our own experience in life of seeing times can become very tough, it’s the wise person who prepares him- or herself by intentionally fostering the skills of a resilient person.

RESILIENCY
First, let’s get a working definition of “resiliency” so we’re clear about the topic. Sources generally describe resiliency like this:

Resiliency is the ability to bounce back from adversity, adapt to challenges, and maintain a generally positive, growth-oriented mindset in the face of life’s troubles.

Being a resilient person is important for the simple fact that, as Jesus said, in this world we will have trouble, adversity, “tough times.” To not be “crushed” by such experiences, we need to have the capacity to endure and “bounce back.” One unidentified source explains:

“Resiliency is crucial because it enables individuals, organizations, and communities to bounce back and adapt positively in the face of adversity, challenges, or setbacks. It involves developing the capacity to withstand and recover from difficult situations, maintain mental and emotional well-being, and continue functioning effectively. Resiliency fosters flexibility, problem-solving skills, and the ability to navigate change, contributing to long-term success and well-being in various aspects of life.”

Some people are more naturally resilient than others, but none of us are born to be as resilient as we’ll need to be. That’s why, in the paragraph above, it’s emphasized that resiliency is a capacity that can be developed, and the starting point is with our faith and our spiritual life:

A couple of weeks ago, my wife and I made the long drive from San Antonio, Texas, to Pasadena, California, where we now reside. We passed through hundreds of miles of southwestern desert, most of which was filled with dry soil, colorful rocks, and scraggy shrubs. Every now and then, however, we’d see ribbons of bright green trees flourishing in the midst of the desert.

What was their secret? Inevitably, those trees grew next to a water source, even a seasonal one. Their roots grew deep into the nearby soil, which allowed them to survive in a harsh climate and even to bear fruit.

I want to be like those trees. I want to be fruitful in life, making a difference for God’s kingdom in everything I do. But I know there will be hard times, times of turmoil, stress, and suffering. In these times, I want to be a “tree” whose leaves do not wither. Even if I’m not bearing much fruit at the moment, I want to be remain vital. I expect you feel similarly about your own life. You want to be a “tree” in the mode of Psalm 1.

How can we be such “trees”? By letting our roots grow deeply into God’s living water. And how can we do this? By delighting in God’s truth and meditating upon it. The more we allow the biblical words of life to fill our minds and hearts, the more we are anchored to God’s revelation, the more we draw sustenance from God’s perspective and promises, the more we will be bear ample fruit in good times and hang in there during hard times.

(Source: Mark D. Roberts, Life for Leaders, a Devotional Resource of the DePree Leadership Center at Fuller Theological Seminary).

THE RIGHT STARTING POINT FOR FOSTERING RESILIENCY
Nothing enables us to be resilient people more than living a life that is firmly rooted in Jesus Christ:

“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit,” Jeremiah 17:7-8.

“And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness,” Colossians 2:6-7.

The focus on Jesus is immensely practical because of this, the other half of the scripture quote given earlier: “I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world,” John 16:33.

Because Jesus has overcome the world, He instructs us to make Him our foundational source of our own resiliency:

“Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash,” Matthew 7:24-27.

Take a look at how James and the Apostle Paul reveal a life of faith exercised in God builds and results in resiliency:

“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing,” James 1:2-4.

“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love,” Romans 5:3-5.

“That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever,” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18.

ADDITIONAL WAYS YOU CAN FOSTER RESILIENCY
If you want to become a resilient person, in addition to maintaining a robust faith in God, consider the following:

Learning from adversity – Viewing challenges as opportunities for growth and learning helps individuals develop a resilient mindset, fostering maturing through adversity.

Adaptive thinking – Developing the ability to reframe thoughts and reinterpret situations, focusing on solutions rather than problems, helps individuals navigate adversity with a more optimistic outlook.

Emotional regulation – Learning to manage and regulate emotions enables individuals to respond effectively to stress and setbacks, fostering emotional resilience.

Flexibility and adaptability – Being open to change, learning from experiences, and adapting to new circumstances contribute to resilience in the face of uncertainty. People who insist on entrenched thinking are usually the people most devastated by adversity.

Goal setting – Setting realistic goals and breaking them down into manageable steps provides a sense of progress and direction, contributing to resilience.

Problem-solving skills – Developing practical problem-solving skills enhances the capacity to analyze situations, identify potential solutions, and take effective action in the face of adversity.

Personal fitness – Making a lifestyle of positive habits such as healthy nutrition, physical exercise, self-awareness, and a healthy sleep pattern will make you mentally, emotionally, and physically (and even spiritually) more capable to endure times of adversity.

Positive relationships – Building and maintaining supportive relationships with friends, family, your church family, and others in your community fosters a sense of belonging and provides a network of support during challenges.

Scotty