The surprising and powerful role parents can play in the lives of their children …

Most parents are familiar with the saying, “Children are the pride and joy of their parents.” It’s a phrase that captures the deep affection and satisfaction parents feel as they watch their children grow, succeed, and thrive. But there’s a scripture that turns this concept on its head. Proverbs 17:6 states, “Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents are the pride of their children.” This verse offers a radically different way of thinking about the parent-child relationship — it’s not just that children are the pride of their parents, but that parents themselves are meant to be the pride of their children.

While children naturally desire to be their parents’ pride and joy, the idea of parents being the pride of their children is not something we often hear. Yet, in a world where children look up to their parents for guidance and strength, there is a deeper longing to see parents who are worthy of that pride. This verse challenges us to reflect on how we can live in such a way that we inspire that kind of admiration and respect.

To be the pride of your children is more than just being loved by them, it’s about being someone they look up to with deep respect and admiration. It’s about being a role model who embodies qualities they can be proud of: integrity, wisdom, love, and faithfulness. Children desire to see their parents living lives of purpose, making decisions that reflect godly values, and consistently showing strength in character.

This is the kind of pride Proverbs 17:6 speaks of, one that is earned, not merely given. It’s not about perfection, but about modeling a life that aligns with what is good and right. Parents who live with integrity, humility, and faith inspire their children to hold them in the highest esteem. And when this happens, it creates a lasting bond based not just on affection, but on a deep, enduring respect.

The challenge for many parents is understanding how they can earn this kind of pride from their children. This doesn’t mean being perfect, no one can be. But it does mean striving to live with integrity, wisdom, and love as we follow in the footsteps of Christ. Here are some ways parents can cultivate this kind of pride:

1. Live with integrity and consistency. Children are keen observers of the world around them, and they notice when actions align with words. Parents who live with integrity — who do what they say they will do and keep their commitments — instill a sense of pride in their children. Integrity builds trust and respect, and it shows children the power of honesty, reliability, and authenticity. Proverbs 20:7 says, “The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them.”

2. Model Christ-like love and sacrifice. Children learn about love and sacrifice from their parents. When parents show sacrificial love — whether through selfless acts, giving of their time, or forgiving one another — they teach their children how to love others well. This kind of love, rooted in humility and caring, becomes a source of pride. Children admire parents who prioritize the well-being of others and live with a heart of compassion.

3. Impart wisdom and guide with grace. Parents become a source of pride when they share their wisdom and offer guidance with grace. When parents take the time to listen, counsel, and teach their children, they provide a firm foundation for their lives. It’s through these interactions that children begin to see their parents not only as authority figures but as wise mentors. Proverbs 4:7 states, “Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment.”

4. Be transparent and humble. No one is perfect, and parents who humbly admit their mistakes and seek forgiveness from their children model growth and maturity. Transparency and humility in the face of failure teach children that growth is a continual process, and that they too can learn from their mistakes. Authenticity creates a deeper respect in children who see their parents as real people, flawed but committed to doing what is right.

5. Live with purpose and faithfulness. Children are inspired by parents who live with purpose, who know their calling, who serve others, and who remain faithful even when life is difficult. Parents who prioritize their faith and live it out daily give their children something to aspire to. The pride children feel is a direct result of the parents’ unwavering dedication to a life of meaning, faith, and integrity.

For parents who may feel that they haven’t been the kind of role model they wish to be or should have been, it’s important to remember that there is grace. No matter where we find ourselves, it’s always possible to make a change and begin living in a way that reflects godly wisdom, integrity, and love. Parents can turn to Christ for guidance, asking for strength to walk in His footsteps and to live out His example of humility, faithfulness, and love.

For children who may not have had this kind of role model, the good news is that they, too, can become the kind of parent who earns their children’s pride. Through God’s grace, they can embody the kind of integrity, wisdom, and love that Proverbs 17:6 encourages.

WHY IT MATTERS …
When parents embody the qualities that inspire pride in their children, the effects ripple through generations. Children who are proud of their parents are more likely to carry forward the values and wisdom they’ve learned from them. They pass it on to their own children, creating a legacy of respect, faith, and integrity. This ripple effect creates a sense of unity, purpose, and shared values within the family.

When parents earn the pride of their children, they establish a relationship rooted in deep admiration that can weather the storms of life. As children grow older and navigate challenges, they will look back on their parents as a source of strength and guidance. The sense of pride that once started in childhood transforms into a lifelong admiration that strengthens the parent-child bond.

The pride a child feels for a parent isn’t based on achievements or accolades. It’s the quiet confidence that comes from seeing the wisdom of God lived out day after day, the humility of a parent who faithfully walks in God’s ways, and the love that never falters. When parents live with this kind of integrity, they become an example of what it means to honor God and to show that same honor in their relationship with their children.

Scotty