How learning to name your emotions can give you more control over your life …

If you ask the average person whether they understand their emotions, most will confidently say yes. But do they really?

Imagine this: You find yourself snapping at a coworker over a minor inconvenience. Frustration bubbles up, and you tell yourself, “I’m just angry.” But is anger really the root of your reaction? Or is it covering something deeper — perhaps embarrassment, disappointment, or even feeling unappreciated?

THE HIDDEN COMPLEXITY OF EMOTIONS
Emotions are rarely as simple as they seem. Research shows that we often misidentify what we’re feeling because our brains instinctively go for the most familiar labels — usually broad emotions like anger, sadness, or stress. In reality, what we first assume we’re feeling may just be a surface reaction masking a deeper, more specific emotion.

This is why learning to name your emotions is so important. If you don’t take the time to pinpoint what you’re actually feeling, you may react in ways that don’t truly address your emotional state. Accurately identifying your emotions allows you to better understand yourself, communicate more effectively, and regulate your responses in a healthier way.

A landmark study by Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, a leading researcher in affective neuroscience, found that individuals with a more nuanced emotional vocabulary (a concept known as “emotional granularity”) experience better mental health outcomes. In contrast, people who lump emotions into vague categories like “bad” or “good” tend to struggle more with anxiety, depression, and emotional regulation.

WHY NAMING YOUR EMOTIONS IS BENEFICIAL
1. It helps you regulate your reactions. Neuroscience tells us that the brain processes emotions in the amygdala, a region responsible for detecting threats and triggering survival responses. But when we accurately name our emotions, we activate the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for rational thinking. This shift allows us to respond to situations with intention rather than react impulsively.

2. It improves emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence (EQ) is strongly linked to success in personal and professional life. A study published in Emotion found that individuals who could differentiate between emotions (e.g., frustration vs. disappointment) were better at managing stress and conflict. Simply put, if you can name it, you can tame it.

3. It reduces stress and anxiety. Research from UCLA psychologist Dr. Matthew Lieberman demonstrated that putting emotions into words (a process called “affect labeling”) actually reduces activity in the amygdala, calming the nervous system. His research suggests that when we verbally acknowledge emotions, we lessen their grip on us.

4. It strengthens relationships. Misunderstood emotions often lead to miscommunication. If you express only anger when you’re actually hurt, the people around you may respond defensively rather than supportively. Accurately identifying your emotions allows you to communicate needs more effectively and build healthier relationships.

HOW TO GET BETTER AT NAMING YOUR EMOTIONS
Expand your emotional vocabulary. Instead of just saying “I’m stressed,” try specifying what kind of stress: Is it pressure? Overwhelm? Fear of failure? Annoyance? The more precise you are, the more insight you gain.

Pause before reacting. The next time you feel an emotional surge, take a moment to ask: “What’s really going on here?” Consider what triggered the feeling and whether it’s masking another, deeper emotion.

Use an emotion wheel. Psychologists often use an emotion wheel (such as the Geneva Emotion Wheel) to help individuals break down primary emotions into more specific ones. Seeing emotions mapped out visually can aid in clarity.

Journal your feelings. Writing down your emotions forces you to put them into words, which increases awareness and helps in processing them more effectively.

Talk it out with a trusted person. Sometimes, discussing your emotions with a friend, counselor, or pastor can help you articulate them more clearly. They may also provide insight that helps you identify emotions you hadn’t recognized on your own.

Naming your emotions gives you greater clarity to recognize the thoughts and feelings that shape your reactions. This awareness better enables you to choose how to respond, leading to more intentional and rational actions and healthier relationships. As you begin to understand your emotions more accurately, you gain the ability to navigate life with greater self-awareness, making decisions that align with your values and fostering a deeper sense of control over how you engage with the world.

Scotty