What do some pastors most dislike about their job? Shepherding …

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There’s a troubling confession I hear from pastors more often than you’d expect: I don’t like shepherding. Not I don’t like preaching, not I don’t like leading, but I don’t like dealing with people’s problems, their drama, their expectations, their constant needs — I do’t like dealing with people!. Some might not say it out loud (many do!), but they feel it deep down. And let’s be real — if a shepherd doesn’t want to shepherd, we have a serious problem.

Pastoral care is one of the most exhausting and emotionally demanding aspects of ministry. It’s also one of the most biblical and inescapable. God doesn’t call pastors to be CEOs, event coordinators, or public speakers, He calls them to tend His flock. So, what happens when a pastor struggles to do the very thing God has entrusted to him? Can a reluctant shepherd learn to love the work of shepherding?

WHY DO SOME PASTORS DISLIKE SHEPHERDING?
Ministry is deeply rewarding, but pastoring a church is also a relentless task. Many pastors resist shepherding for several reasons:

    • Shepherding is emotionally draining. Week after week, pastors bear the burdens of others — marital crises, illnesses, financial struggles, and spiritual doubts. Compassion fatigue is real.
    • People can be difficult. Church members have expectations, complaints, and sometimes a sense of entitlement that wears pastors down. It’s one thing to lead willing sheep; it’s another to deal with stubborn, ungrateful, or divisive ones.
    • Results are often invisible. A sermon has an immediate impact. A counseling session? It might take years to see change if it ever comes.
    • Pastors struggle juggling availability with personal and family needs. The never-ending demands of ministry often leave pastors feeling guilty for stepping away, yet exhausted from never doing so. When boundaries are unclear, resentment can grow — toward both the role and the people they serve.

But here’s the thing: avoiding shepherding isn’t a solution. It’s a warning sign. So, how can pastors who feel drained, frustrated, or uninterested in shepherding learn to embrace it?

REDISCOVERING THE HEART OF SHEPHERDING:
1. Shift the focus from burden to calling. When shepherding feels like a burden, it’s easy to resent it. But shepherding is not just a duty, it’s a calling from God. Jesus Himself is the Good Shepherd (John 10:11), and pastors are called to reflect His heart. If you find yourself seeing people as problems instead of a flock entrusted to you, it’s time to reconnect with why you answered the call to ministry in the first place.

2. Set healthy boundaries without guilt. Many pastors feel overwhelmed because they fail to set firm boundaries. Jesus didn’t heal everyone or meet every need in His earthly ministry; He withdrew to rest and pray (Luke 5:16). Shepherding doesn’t mean being endlessly available; it means being intentionally available in a way that’s sustainable.

3. Delegate and share the load. Pastors are not called to do everything alone. In Acts 6, the apostles appointed godly men to oversee practical needs so they could focus on prayer and ministry of the Word. Sharing shepherding needs among elders, working with other church staff (if there are other staff), and recruiting other lay leaders to engage in pastoral care helps distribute the responsibility and prevents burnout.

4. Invest in the right people. It’s easy to spend ninety percent of pastoral energy on the ten percent of people who drain it most. Prioritize those who are receptive and ready to grow instead of exhausting yourself on those who refuse to change.

5. Find joy in small victories. Shepherding usually doesn’t yield instant results, but that doesn’t mean it’s ineffective. When a struggling marriage finds healing, when a discouraged believer takes a step of faith, when a lost sheep returns — these are moments worth celebrating. The impact of shepherding is often slow-growing but deeply significant.

6. Renew your own spiritual health. A pastor who neglects his own soul will struggle to care for others. Spend time with God outside of sermon preparation. Seek discipleship for yourself, as well as accountability. Guard your spiritual health as fiercely as you guard your church members’.

Pastors who don’t like shepherding aren’t alone, but they also can’t afford to stay there. Ministry isn’t about personal preference; it’s about divine calling. Shepherding is hard, messy, and often thankless but it’s also sacred. If you struggle with this part of ministry, take it as a sign to step back, reassess, and realign your heart with God’s. The flock entrusted to you isn’t just your responsibility, shepherding it is your privilege. And with the right mindset, boundaries, and support, shepherding can become not just a duty, but a joy.

Scotty